sometimes i feel like i just want to leave everything and give up, but there are times that i want to work hard a prove to everyone that i can do it that i will graduate from high school, im not doing that bad imn school but some times i dont feel like going to adult school i really dont like it. lifes crazy there sooo much shit. with friends family everything. i've learned the hard why that there are no real true friends. i hate the fact that i keep things in and i really dont express myself. but if i did i dont think that i would have the friends that i do. except for one with is my friend marian she never seems to do anything to make me mad or think bad about her, we seem to be alike in many different ways. but at the same time we're different. we just get along very well i feel that i can tell her anything and she wot judge me, and wont go talk shit. i can't say that about all my friends cause some are real shit talkers. im not gonna say that i never say anything about any one cause that would be a bunch of shit. but sometime s they take it too far. its stupid!!! i dont like to be put aside for a guy either. just cause i got my eye on a guy doesnt mean im going to drop my friends cause guys come and got but my TRUE FRIENDS will aways be there. i don't like to say anything but it's real fucked up when the just drop u for a dude and then when hes gone or hes not there u gonna come talk to me that bull shit i dont want that shit. high school is dramma fuck!! cant wait to till i get out of there and kinda distence myself from everyone except that one true friend. and bf's fuck thats a whole other deal damn that major dramma!!! sometimes i dont know what to do. there are soo many things. and college shit. y cant i just do it all i wnat to do fashion, and make up and child care and sign language. im gonna try my best to do it all. and work through all this shit. to give my mom that major that she wants soo back. i want to prove to her that i can be someone in life time not just going to be another person just working at micky D's. i want to be some one. but fuck its hard when ur lazy (lol) gotta put some juice it. i can do it im gonna prove it to my self  PEACE!!